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Wednesday, May 21, 2008


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zombie mom

You got me de-lurking with this one.

I would seriously pack up the animals, kids,hubs, stuff and head to Fiji. I would start small business there and get back to painting and help out with leveraging health care resources to rural villagers. I would eat tons of fish and scuba dive and look at beautiful birds each and every day. And I would stay at least until the kids were ready for middle school.


I would move to NYC (again animals, kids, hubs, and stuff) go to graduate school to get my PhD in medical anthropology.


Lady Jaye

I think for me I would go to Nottingham, England. I have several friends living there that would welcome me. I think in some ways it would be the first place I've felt truly at home. I think ultimately though I would miss my family, miss the South, and miss college football. I'll just have to sucker them all to coming back to America with me.

Miss Britt

I would live in New York City.

I wouldn't choose where I lived based on friends and family. (I cannot BELIEVE I am saying that to you...) - because friends and family will remain friends and family no matter where you live. And you can visit them.

I would pick the PLACE that made my heart sing.

I didn't move to Florida because of Adam. I moved to Florida because I can't live in NYC right now with the kids and I love, love, love the heat and the beach. I picked Orlando because of the job. :-)


I'm torn between moving to Mexico to open a taco shack and drink beers or move to the beach in California. I'd really love to be able to be more creative in whatever I do with my time.

Honestly, besides my current job, I'm pretty happy with my life. And that's an amazing thing to recognize. Woah.

radioactive tori

I have mixed thoughts on this one. If I didn't have kids to think about, my answer would be very different than it is with kids. I would like to move somewhere warm because I hate winter, but because my kids are settled where we are I would stay here. If this hypothetical doesn't include worrying about my kids, Arizona would be my first choice because when I lived there in high school I loved it. If I were on my own I would probably go there, even though I have no family there. I'm not super close with my family though so I am guessing my answer would be different if I was. I'd love to live on a beach somewhere. Australia was nice too though.

This question sort of hurts my brain a little because it is something I have been sort of thinking about for a while and can't even figure out what I would do. I sort of feel a little like I have lost my "self" since I am always thinking about everyone else and right at this very moment I have no idea what *I* want, in anything, even things as simple as what place we should eat, only what I *should* want to make everything easy for everyone else. (don't worry, it is something I am working on fixing...I think you probably know what I am talking about, but if not email me and I will fill you in. Mostly that I just need to remember that I am a whole person even without my kids even though I love them with all my heart...and that is totally off the topic that you brought up so maybe I should write my own damn post on my own blog!)


First choice would be to go where the friends are. Next would be a random spot on the map.


I would move to New York City.

(Is this a surprise to anyone? No, no it is not.)


PS - I wanted to live in NYC as soon as I visited in 1998 but life circumstances prevented me from doing so. Dawg is a bonus to living there. A substantial bonus. :)


If I had no ties, nothing to stop me, I would abso-fucking-lutely go with "throw the restraints of practicality out of the window and start living your life exactly the way you want to and where you want to?" In a heartbeat ;o)
You only get one life - do it, and do it ALL sweetie!


I would move out of the country. Italy or Japan or New Zealand or Costa Rica or wherever the wind blew me. Either that or I would pursue my baseball dreams and move to wherever I could get a job.


I would move out of the country. Italy or Japan or New Zealand or Costa Rica or wherever the wind blew me. Either that or I would pursue my baseball dreams and move to wherever I could get a job.


I'd move to a place that I'd really want to be. Sometimes we need to take risks. I packed my bags and moved to Atlanta when I was 22. I ended up back in Jersey two years later but the experience was totally worth it.

Go where your heart takes you Hilly!


I want to live in a nice big place... with lot's of storage and a huge open space to have all my craft stuff and my computer stuff and a large kitchen so I can cook and craft and blog and still have lots of room to move. Doesn't really matter where, but I'd like to be close to my family...


This is so weird because I am about to pack up and move to Singapore, and my husband and I were just talking last night about how I can be anything I want when I get there. I can be a completely different person. But I don't know if I know how to be anyone other than who I am. I'm going to try. I'm going to find more happiness in life. Find a joke in everything I do. Laugh and have fun and not get bogged down by the fear and hate and crap in life. If you have a chance to be anything you want, why not make it the person you've always wanted to be?


Wow, that's a toughie. My first instinct would be to move wherever you are, seriously. You're my bestest buddy and I think I could be happy anywhere that I have regular Hilary access.


Dallas. I have tons of friends there. Wouldn't much care if the bulk of my family was 1,000 miles away (again). My daughters would be close by and that would sustain me.


Amsterdam. For obvious reasons.


New York -- it is where I'm meant to be. I'm from Long Island originally, but I no longer have family there. But, like Britt said, New York makes my heart sing.


Hil, I lived a rootless life for three years because I had a job that allowed me to move somewhere new every 3 months. During that period I learned that I don't feel "at home" outside the Southwest. So given that, I would live somewhere in Arizona, New Mexico, or Texas.

My second consideration is that I hate small towns, so that would narrow the field of possibilities.

Having friends and family close by would be great, but I've found I'm usually able to make new friends wherever I move.

I'm guessing that if you are posting this question, you must be about to make a big decision yourself. Good luck with whatever you decide. You will bloom wherever you are planted.


My actions: travel the world for 6 weeks. See places I had never seen before, take lots of pictures, write many blog updates.

Then once I came back home, I would sell the house (well, my fiance would, since it's her house) and we would go find a place on the beach (or at least walking distance). Since Newport Beach has been one of the places I've wanted to live since I was a kid, I would find the cheapest, and best configured home for under $1.5 mil and enjoy my time writing my novels, screenplays, articles and blog posts.

All of this is assuming I have the dough to do it all with.

Oh, and a midtown apartment in Manhattan so I can enjoy the big city life whenever I wanted.

And since you (Hilly) live in O.C., I would have regular blogger meetups where we drink, get silly and then twat everyone that can't be there.


I'd move somewhere that I'd always wanted to live. If that was near friends, so much the better.

Cissa Fireheart

Florida....preferably somewhere near a beach...I was quite fond of the Gulf Coast, but anywhere in FL works, honestly

but I also would need access to just....land, like a big open field or a small patch of forest with a clearing...you know, for my pagan rituals and stuff...and privacy..for non-pagan jaunts with Misk *insert eyebrow wiggle here*

Florida is home to me...I always feel as ease there. I miss it, and now thanks to Blogging I have more friends that are there than I did before!

Karen Sugarpants

Well hypothetically if this is YOU we are talking about, and not me? I'd pack up my stuff and move to Canada, where I could hang with my buddy Sugarpants, drink wine, eat pasta salad and live happily ever after knowing that she would love me unconditionally forever and ever amen.

But if it was me? I love my life. I ain't goin' nowhere. Well, till we sell the house - but this general area is cool.


I am such a ninny. If all of a sudden I am single and chidless, I would need family and friend support for a year or so while I got my shit together.

Now with boy and child, and the freedom to do whatever... Halifax, Boston, London (now that is a CITY.) With the freedom, though I might just keep home home for a while and travel and explore and see where I'd want to lay down some roots. Family is whever those two are. On second thought, keep friends and family here... and just travel.


Already living where I'd pick. Stay right here in the greater Chicago area. Born here, die here, miss it when I'm away.


as long as my kids are with, me, i'd stay right where i am now

Shannon Hilson

It would depend a lot on how much money I had to play with, but let's say for the sake of argument that I have plenty and can probably afford a move to any place I'd like.

I'd LOVE to move back to Europe. I was born there, and I lived there as a little girl. Even though I'm American, and have lived here my entire adult life, and most of my childhood, Europe feels like home to me for some reason. I lived in Germany before, but I'd like to try living in England, Scotland, or France at some point before I die. I wouldn't mind spending some time in Greece either.

As far as what I'd do for a living? I'd keep painting if I could. Writing, too. In the internet age, there's really no reason why I couldn't do pretty much anything I wanted anyWHERE I wanted, right? I also have this odd little fantasy that involves owning a small farm or bake shop. I'd love to try that, too.

LOL... obviously this is something I've thought about before, and a lot, too.

: )


Hilly, throw practicality oout the window and start living your life exactly the way you want, where you want and on yourown terms! :) Of the options these are my thoughts:

Family - absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Friends - probably the best spot because we all flourish where we are the most comfortable.
Random spot - Seattle is the place to be!

Mr. Fabulous

I would move to...hmm...gosh, Lexington, Kentucky.

I hear good things :)


The total sad part is that everything comes back to you wherever you go. It´s like you can´t escape, ever. That boomerang of old stuff hits you in the neck eventually if you don´t look it in the eye.
Hypothetically, I´d say New York. I´ve lived there already. It´s a sanctuary (or was) or Berlin. I would like to be able to say somewhere in the countryside, live a quiet life but I know I´ll go crazy with that mentality that comes with it. I need big cities and a getaway plan.


ok, another peasant comment. Somehow I didn´t mean that you have to look a boomerang in the eye. lol. sigh. gasp. *dies of shame already*


This is a question that makes my heart ache...absolutely, positively, without a doubt be near family!

My siblings and mom and dad live in the same town, and while I always said I never wanted to live there again, I would do it to be near them and have my kids grow up seeing their grandparents weekly and being close to their cousins. We live relatively near my hubby's family and they are the antithesis of a support system - their passive/aggressive crap takes more energy than if they didn't even live close by! So, that makes living near my family that much more appealing...

I have found that having young children does not lend itself to maintaining close adult friendships. It's hard to get through the day, put the kids to bed, do the dishes, make the lunches and still have the energy to call someone up on the phone or send an email. My college friends surface periodically, but that's not really enough to sustain me.

Alas, hubby's job can only be done a few places in the country, and this is one of them.


I'm doing exactly that.

"Where would you live?"

New York

"Would you move to a place where you have family, even though they're not exactly thrilled with you at the moment?"


"Would you go where you have lots of friends with open arms, lots of laughter and hugs to last a lifetime?"

No, I can visit my original hometown for that, or visit my loved friends where they are for that. Or have them visit me!

"Would you just open a map, point, and go to some random spot?"

No, place is very important to me. This has always been true for me. You could even say there is a spiritual component to that for me.

"Do you think practically or do you, for once, through the restraints of practicality out of the window and start living your life exactly the way you want to and where you want to?"

Adulthood demands some consideration of prudence, but that is relative for each of us, varying wildly depending upon an individual's priorities. For me, practicality is not a serious consideration. Do I truly want something? If yes, then I will adjust life around that, make it work, never feel beholden to what others or statistics or environment or any other element outside myself claims about its practicality or likelihood of working out well. Fuck them, man. It's my life and I've only got the one. If I can't beat whatever odds may be against me, fine, but I won't die having to say I stayed home in a rut and didn't at least try. Epic Fail? Go somewhere, lick my wounds, rethink things, devise some new exciting thing, and go try that.


I think by the way you phrased the last option, you know where your heart is leading you. Have courage. The greatest rewards come from the biggest risks.

Me, on the other hand, I have lived in one place my whole life. My home is where my friends and family are. I can't imagine living any place else. :)


I think I would go back several posts ago to re-read a comment left by one of your readers about how much better you feel about yourself when you are surrounded by friendship, love and people that get you. I would surround myself with people that make me want to be a better person. If that's friendville, bring it, if it's family, cool too. I don't think I would just pick a random destination. I would have to have a comfortable start to my new adventure.

hello haha narf

i truly love pittsburgh, i bleed the three rivers. honestly, i can't imagine ever leaving here. granted i have tons of friends and family here, but i can make friends anywhere so that isn't it. i just love this town. so, ummmm, yeah i don't think i would go anywhere permanently.

follow your heart, my dear hilly. trust your gut and your heart.


One word: Paris.


Hypothetically? No children or man and unlimited money?

I'd travel before I settled down to a place.

But, if money was limited, and I was just free, free, free....

I'd probably move to the beach. (Oregon, not California.)


I would move to any city I've always wanted to visit - and keep moving until I found the place for me :)


I would move to Korea, get a pet, stay for too long and consider staying for longer to save more money and keep getting my crap together. Oh wait, I already did.


I would follow my heart & do whatever it is I really wanted to do. If living in the Colorado Rockies was an experience I always wanted, I'd find a job there doing something I liked. And when my heart's desire changed, I'd follow that too.
From what I've heard on talk shows, successful people say it doesn't matter what you do, if you do what you love.


I would probably pick somewhere I had a support system, whether it be friends or family. In fact, that's exactly what I did 8 years ago when I came home after getting divorced in Georgia. I had a small child and needed to know someone would be there for him if something happened to me.

That said, I've been thinking lately that 8 years is the longest I have spent in one place in my entire life and I'm getting the itch to try something new. Like Napa. At the Culinary Institute. Just sayin.

Iron Fist

Australia, so that I could surf during Christmas season. But I'd only go if I could bring some friends with me.

I could actually expound on this in length, but rather than clutter up your comments I'll probably write you a letter.

(After I catch up on my sleep, that is, which I'm even more behind on than my blog reading. Stupid job, ugh.)


I would move to NYC or London. I'm more of a place than people person. I moved to Seattle on a whim more than 10 years ago, because I remembered visiting in the summer as a kid and the days seemed to never end.


I was 100% willing to relocate to Florida. You go where your heart tells you. You are in control of that sugar.


I guess I'd have to say that I'd move to New York...I've never lived in a large city, and since I work in theatre, it seems like a logical step.

My husband & I recently followed a job out West...it really took a leap of faith to come here, but I am loving it, and I'm so glad that we did it. I'm thousands of miles away from my friends & family, but I needed the change for my own sanity. I'm just glad the hubby was willing to go along for the ride. Follow your heart and your instincts.


If you're interested in exploring the 'what if' scenario in your own life with reliving your life with different decisions, check out the book "Replay" by ken Grimwood. He does a great job with it.

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