Most Of Everyday Is Full Of Tired Excuses.....

Tired excuses are something that we all come up with; let's just call it "A Million Little Pieces of Bullshit".  Then the panic light comes on when we suddenly realize that all of our excuses have led us into this dark and ugly place, depending on whatever situation it is and then the water comes crashing down on you......you want to be one with the tranquil waters and let them wash over you instead, but the only way that is ever going to happen is if you let it flow and stop putting up the dams that hold the elusive peace at bay.  Yes, that is heavily metaphorical and about a million freaking clues to the lyrical challenge since some of you aren't doing so well lately, ahem.

But these are serious things to ponder with any aspect in life.  I was reading One Big Adventure last night and remembered what it was like to have this positive outlook on life all of the time.....in fact, so much so that people actually called me Pollyanna.  Now, I know that I can be snarky but I really still am an eternal optimist because hope and my faith are the only things that keep me going at all times, especially the darkest.  I hate the feeling that life and/or any particle thereof is a constant chore.  I find myself saying, "crap I HAVE to do this and it is going to suck" instead of "holey shmoley, I WANT to this and it could be great!".  I really had come out of part of that bubble last year when I finally stopped flaking on my on-line WW friends and met Foo, then the SoCal WW Divas both named Jamie, then Karl, then Kel and now I am like "bring it on" when it comes to meeting people; anxiety no longer controls that part of my life.

Negativity breeds more negativity as positivity does quite the opposite; hell, we all know this.  Sometimes, as cliche as it sounds, you almost have to force yourself to put on the damned rose colored glasses and look at the world in a whole new light.  And to quote the lovely Delores O'Riordan, "if it doesn't work like this, then try it another way".  Quite recently I decided to make these huge changes in my life as you all know....with regard to my career, the med sitch, the weight loss struggles and finding out what it was that was making my insides rot with misery while I put on one fine-assed happy little puppet show for the masses.  I dove into darkness and came out alive and better for it.

My inner-circle of friends and a lot of blogs that I have been reading lately have mentioned new beginnings, starting over, looking at things in a new light.  On the weight loss front, Jess is closing her kitchen and Foo got real with it this week.  I also decided that my weakness is booze and am giving it up until the end of the year unless it is a special occasion (and by that, no asses....I do not count Friday as a special occasion, LOL!).  I am trying to look at my elliptical as if it is this magical wonder-drug love machine that is my key to all things better; I am doing the same with my food choices....hell, today I went out to lunch and did great with points! My weight loss endeavors are taking a turn because *I* decided to turn that negative bullshit around and every time I feel like pouting and whining over something, I remember that I am blessed and lucky to be able to have tools to fix myself in every way and that God, or The Higher Power for you non-God people,  is right there wanting me to have peace and happiness when I head towards a new goal instead of going in ready to fail......man, I've spent half of my life setting myself up to fucking fail and it sucks.

I've got my ducks in a row now and am fixing the two physical things that I can, which are my continued weight loss and my career sitch. Both of those things are on the upswing and no matter what happens, from this point on I am changing my mentality to really be thankful for what I get to do, see and feel rather than piss and moan about how much it sucks to have to do things like oh....go to the grocery store.  Now then, do not be confused....I reserve the right to snark about assjackets and the like because that is who I am!  But, the tired excuses are fading away and now I just am going to embrace life and tell that beyotch to give me more, like now please!

Being Just Like The Water Kisses,
Me

Comments

[tori]

Good for you for being positive again! I totally always get made fun of because even in the worst situation, all I ever seem to see is the good part. Works for me most of the time, but may be a tad bit unhealthy sometimes.

Also, I know the song name, but have no idea who sang it, can I get half a point????

[ms. sizzle]

thanks for always inspiring me snackie. :)

[christie]

Hilly-
You really helped me a lot today. Even though I have a positive attitude I am really good at letting excuses get the better of me and being way overdramatic "OH GOD I don't want to fold all this laundry" Or pleeaaassseee not the grocery store. It's all so small in the big picture. I'm ispired by your new attitude and I hope I can do a good job of copycatting.

[Mr. Fabulous]

You know, that is awesome. I am not sure how many people what a chore it is to get ducks to get in a row. I mean sure, they will follow their mother, but it is very difficult to get them to follow a human, even one as charming and personable as yourself.

This has been a Friday Special Suck Up Comment. We hope you have enjoyed this comment, and ask you to please post responsibly.

[Leslee]

Awesome Hil, just awesome. :0)

~Les

[bee]

Thanks for the motivation :) I love these kind of posts. Especially on a Friday afternoon!!!

[Jessica]

Awesome post, Hilly - and thanks for the shout-out. My totally OCD-drive "close the kitchen" routine really does help me, psychologically, draw the line between eating-time and not-eating-time.

And WTG on giving up the booze. I'm not quite there yet with a firm "give up" but I am going on four days with no wine so far, and that's good for me (though last night I reallllly wanted my glass of wine with dinner!)

I actually had a dream last night that I was at a bar and ordered a diet coke instead of wine and Chris looked at me as though my head was on backwards. ;-)

[Foo Foo]

Love this post Hil. I'm thinking about you a lot today and I'm glad that we both got real with what we had been doing. Being surrounded by people that are on the same page makes a world of difference. I puffy heart that we are BFF. Healing vibes are being sent your way.

[Rachel]

I definitely need to get better about keeping a positive mental attitude and watching what I say. Snark and sarcasm aren't as fabulous as I'd like to think they are.

[Xavier]

You know what? I have the most amazing fruit flies in my life. I do, I really do. I look forward to our evening out. We're long overdue.

Take care of you...

*CHEERS*

[panthergirl]

Hey.... what did I miss? What surgery??

I'm addicted to FitDay.com which is how I've lost 10 pounds in the last 4 weeks or so. The wakeup call was recording everything I ate in the first day and seeing the 54 grams of fat I was regularly consuming throughout the course of a normal day.

I've fixed that and I've started exercising again...and it's working.

Good luck to you!! AND your work sitch! I'm trying to change mine too.

[Dutchbitch]

That's great. Embracing life, though hard at times, is the way to go!